Letter to the Editor: Jeb Bradley recently wrote about 2024 legislative priorities. including in his list "empowering our parents". As a parent I certainly understand the need for and importance of empowerment. As a piece of this, it's also parents advocate for their children.
In the same light, parents typically strive to teach their children to be advocates for themselves, on the way to preparing them to be empowered adults/parents. Although I have to admit the modern way of giving children choices about most everything starting when they are toddlers is a little over the top for me. Is it really in a child's best interest to ask if they want to take a bath or eat breakfast? But I wander.
Those same empowered parents are important to their communities. "New Wave of Evidence researchers found that students with involved parents get higher scores, enroll in higher-level programs and have good attendance, stronger social skills and better behavior. This was true regardless of income or background." Research has also found that schools with strong community support perform better overall and have lower dropout rates and higher quality programs.
What I am concerned about is, have we lost in this emphasis on empowered parents, the value other people bring to us, our parenting and our children. No doubt, children benefit from guidance by their parents both at home and in the community/at school. But they also benefit from others.
Certainly, for generations, families have sought advice and guidance from clergy, family members, doctors, teachers and people they trust/consider experts in their community. Are we abandoning these sources of support and expertise in our foci on parental empowerment?
Are we forgetting that favorite teacher, neighbor, or family member who was critical to our growth and development? Are we shortchanging our children given it can be a doctor, teacher or other adult who provides insight into our children, which we, the parent, doesn't see? Or solutions for an issue which we didn't think of? Or share a message or insight with our child which we have been unable to convey?
As well, just as a one or two year old does not have enough information or experience to make an informed decision most of the time -- there are times when parents do not have these, either. We may operate based on past experience, or assumptions which may or may not be appropriate or charged with emotion which leads us to actions we regret later. Empowered parents do not always produce the best responses in all situations. Isn't it therefore helpful to have additional engaged adults to support, guide or assist?
Plus, we need to admit, there are some inadequate parents. Some neglect even abuse their children. Some are incapable due to illness (physical or mental) or addiction or other circumstances to care appropriately for their children. Since we know this, combined with our society's emphasis on keeping families together, don't we need to admit there are parents who are not making the best decisions for their children. In which case, isn't it necessary to balance parent empowerment with child well-being?
We should not get carried away with an emphasis on parental empowerment. Parental support and providing the best outcome for children are also laudable.
Karen Burnett-Kurie
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